Tag Archives: hotels

Beware The Top of The World.

Being a bellman is akin to being a soldier. Except for the “serving your country while selflessly wading into danger” part, of course. But otherwise, there are more similarities than differences. Most bellmen have military-style haircuts. The hours suck. Adherence … Continue reading

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Niagara Falls Is Far From Boring, Kids.

“I hate it in Niagara Falls! Nothing interesting ever happens here! Why didn’t we go to Disney? This family sucks!” – Eleven-year-old Cindy Johnson, a Kardashian in the making. Niagara Falls is boring, Cindy? Eleven hours of  hospitality “labor”. Over … Continue reading

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Yes, This Really Happened.

It was a day like any other. Which, in Niagara Falls, meant anything could, and probably would, happen. And it sure did. One of my hotel’s most popular features is the pool, a chlorine-filled hole in the ground brimming with … Continue reading

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Meet The Greatest Parents Ever.

The tale you are about to read is the unvarnished, chillingly-real truth. The participants are far too stupid to be anything but non-fictional. Saturday, May 23, 8:20 am.  The hallway of an unnamed Niagara Falls luxury hotel. I arrived, cart … Continue reading

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The Hook’s Mini-Guide To Hotel Sex.

In retrospect, using the words “mini” and “sex” in the same title may have been an error in judgement on my part… At any rate, now that I’ve covered the general rules of travel, the next logical step is to … Continue reading

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The Hook’s Definitive Rules of Travel.

I’m going to keep this brief, because let’s face facts, our society has become conditioned to switch our focus every ten seconds… I’ve already lost you, haven’t I? Oh well, for those of you who are still here, we’ll jump … Continue reading

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Overheard In The Hallway…

Sometimes all you need to do is cut to the chase… And let the blogging chips fall where they may. Here’s a snippet of dialogue I was privy to this week as I made my way past a room with … Continue reading

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