Let’s begin with a Travel Tip, shall we?
THE HOOK’S TRAVEL TIPS:
Always remember.. YOU’RE ON VACATION!
Be prepared to spend money on items like food, and I don’t mean dry goods like bags of chips or boxes of cookies to hold your kids over for the week! Unless you’re staying in a motel with a kitchenette, you’re going to have to purchase food for your family.
If you’re staying in an actual hotel – with say, a thousand rooms – you’re not expected to bring copious amounts of food with you.
That having been said, let’s get to the heart of today’s matter.
I head out to a mini-van (Of course!) and meet up with Dennis the Menace‘s father (Get thee to Google children!) and he begins to bypass The Hook and attempts to load his cart himself. After a few plastic bags drop to the ground, he surrenders to his limits.
I can’t really blame him, he had…
- Five bags of food. Chips, cookies, bread, etc.
- One cutting board!
- A large “old-school” cooler with a metal clasp.
- Several small appliances.
- A bag of butane gas cartridges.
- And even some actual luggage!
Finally, he asks one of those questions which, in my skilled hands, becomes a straight line…
CHEAP-ASS DAD: Where’s a good place for all this?
THE HOOK: (Without missing a beat.) Your home, sir.
Reeling from the sting of my dry Canadian wit, he simply stood there a moment, his hamster barely moving on the little wheel deep inside his Yankee brain.
CD: Oh, I get it! Yeah, the wife packed all this stuff, so you know….
THE HOOK: I understand, sir.
CD: Is this a record, though?
THE HOOK: Sadly, no it isn’t.
He chuckled some more, gave me the room number and sent me on my way. Without a tip, of course. I arrived at the room a minute later, where his wife and daughter took a good look at the cart and exclaimed in unison…
“WHAT DID DADDY BRING?”
ON A PERSONAL NOTE…
June 9. 2012 10 A.M – 7 P.M.
Scotiabank Convention Centre
Niagara Falls. Ontario. Canada
For full details, click here, fan boys and girls!
Related articles
- Fate Toys With The Hook! (youvebeenhooked.wordpress.com)
- Business As Usual – Almost…. (youvebeenhooked.wordpress.com)
You've Been Hooked! 
It takes all kinds Hook and you get them all!
I absolutely do!
loved reading this! Your humor is phenomenal 🙂
Tell that to my wife! She doesn’t always get my humor!
I like these travel tips… you need to begin posting more of these since tourist season is just around the corner!
I’ll do my best!
Pingback: Travel Tips, 'Cons, and Fun With Moms And Dads! | You've Been … | travelBug
Well we can’t expect the guy to own up to his own stupidity now, can we? 😉
I guess that would be silly…
Ha! This is a great one, Hook, as always. Your sense of humor is impeccable, and your comedic timing is excellent. You always seem to come up with the most witty and appropriate lines at JUST the right moments. I guess its a well-developed sense that comes as a function of coping with the job, eh? 🙂
Exactly!
Isn’t the purpose of a vacation to get away from all that? Eat out. Enjoy the regional food. Be waited on (and tip profusely in appreciation for the service). In other words, so spoil oneself and family.
You said it! Now if they’d only listen….
Sounds about right. Stupidity is everywhere. There is no escape.
No there isn’t! Lucky for me. right?
To a point. It provides plenty of blog fodder, but in reality it’s just sad how stupid people have become.
It serves a purpose while entertaining; the best of both worlds!
I guess…
Isn’t part of the fun of vacation not having to cook? Why bring the kitchen along? Might as well stay home and pretend you are at a hotel.
They choose to pretend to be normal instead, Derek!
He (C.A. Dad) was so busted. lol!
He sure was! I loved it!
Great post as usual…
Thanks, Paul!
Damn cheap Yankees.
You said it, my brainy friend!
Hilarious!! I’m embarrassed to admit I also point my finger at my husband and blame him when he’s not around!
But you rock, so it’s okay!
Hook cracks me up everytime.
Mr. Bricks
That’s what I’m here for!
Nice one Hook! I think DTM and Gnasher would have a field day with CAD!
I think you’re right, Val!
uxorious man… 😉
Thanks for the support!
LMAO …Great wit …. and I’m still laughing.
Glad to hear it!
Hook, you really said, “your home, sir”. Oh, c’mon, drop the sir!!!! The guy brought Star Market with him, or Stop and Shop, or Jewel … what do you guys have up in the Nor-east?
HILARIOUS!!! Thank you for making me LMFAO!!! ok then.
No Frills, Sobeys or even Wal-Mart!
You’re welcome for the laughs, by the way!
When I go on vacation, cooking is the furthest thing from my mind. I don’t understand people who bring their entire kitchens with them to try to save a few bucks and have mom still cooking a poor dinner in the hotel room. I go on vacation to be pampered. That means to have someone else cook food for me and make up my room and park my car, realizing that I will pay for those services. Some people have no sense.
Thank God for that! Otherwise, what would I wrote about?
I always forget my cutting board.
Don’t you hate when that happens?
At least the guy was smart enough to get the joke…eventually…
Yes, his lightbulb was dim, but working!
Ok, so I have a confession, I take boxes of pop tarts and bags of chips and fruit snacks galore whenever we travel because no matter how many times we stop to eat, these dang kids are ALWAYS hungry! 🙂
I can understand your way of thinking. At least you know where to draw the line!
” Where’s a good place for all of this ? …The home , sir .”
Ahahahaha !
Just like my Mom ! ! She brings coffee pitchers, throws ( just in case ), chips, sandwiches ( 3 different fillings ) bags of Snickers, peanuts, water, sodas, homemade cookies and muffins, macaroni salad ! ! !, Veggies with dips,, etc …. these are what I remember the last time we went on a long trip, ( an 8 hr. drive )
I’m sure your Mom is a lovely lady… but COME ON!!!
And a small dvd player…….
Hahahahah…your butane comment reminded me of spending time in transit in Libya and watching people trying to load all manner of things at check in…butant included. Yes on an aircraft…I had forgotten that episode. Thanks for reminding me.
You’re most certainly welcome, dear lady!
I’m betting they spent just as much “stocking up for vacation” as they would have otherwise. The butane is a bit un-nerving…
It sure was! I’m happy to report that they didn’t blow the building – or themselves – up!
This was awesome! “Your home, sir.” Classic Hook 😉
Although I have a confession…as a mom I bring snacks with me whenever we travel, but maximum two bags. However we have shame…we leave them in the car and bring them up ourselves in the dark of night 😉
“In the dark of night”?
I love that!
Blaming the wife for bringing stuff from home, not a good move.Getting busted for it…priceless!
That’s what I thought!
Too funny. Served him right!
Absolutely!
Another winner!
Thanks, my luck keeps holding out, doesn’t it?
Wünsche dir ein schönes weekend lieber Gruss und einen schönen Tag Gislinde.
Always a pleasure, young lady!
Hey, what’s with the shameless promotion of Comic-con? You just going or are you part of the madness? I will have to send the link to my brother-in-law who lives across the border in North Tonawanda.
I’m happy to report I have received media accreditation for this particular Comic-con! Promoting it is the least I can do!
Huzzah!
You’re a nut!!!!!
My sister travels the same way. When she travels she brings so much stuff because, “just in case the power goes out we have something to cook our food with”. Hilarious Mister The Hook!
Glad to hear of your reading pleasure, Woman!
Blaming it on his wife…of course! I have been known to pack a hefty snack pack in my time though, so I would get blamed on our vacation.
I’m not surprised! Just kidding – kinda.
The slow-moving hamster brain actually brought butane gas cartridges? Was he suppose to cook his meals in the room? And, yes, blaming the misery on his wife, that’s a low one. Hopefully he got your dry Canadian sarcasm and will do so next time…
I doubt he learned his lesson…
if im on your blogroll list try clicking there . always as somehow wp has messed up and got deleted old site tied in with new one can you let me know if it works from your blogroll xxjen
Are you going to the comicon? 😀
You’re joking, right?
I’m always stunned by your answers. It’s exactly the kind of humour I like and want to have myself. (Some claim I do have it, but maybe they are not very reliable 🙂 )
You rock, Hook.
I’m sure you have it, my friend!
lol! im definitely going to keep these in mind next time I travel 🙂
thanks for the share
http://javeriyasayeed.wordpress.com/
You’re very welcome!
Nice to know that Clan Hook travels light!
You know it!