You’ve probably been noticing a lack of Hook in your virtual diet.
Symptoms include but are not limited to:
- Cranium lethargy.
- Sore joints (not the type you roll and which are soon to be legal in Canada) and aching muscles.
- Blurred vision.
- Feelings of severe depression and anxiety with a capital “ANX”.
- Diarrhea. (But keep that symptom to yourself.)
- And in extreme cases… the will to keep on living even thought your life sucks rocks.
The truth is, I’ve tried writing a new post a million times (okay, my math may be a bit off, just go with it) but I just don’t have the ambition. My creative engine is as cold as Melania Trump’s nether region since the public became aware of the “Stormy front” that’s been hitting the White House.
You see, friends… well, the truth is, my mother is lying in a hospital bed battling bladder cancer that has crept into her bones. The prognosis is clean-cut though impossible to accept: she will not survive. Mom has held on for two weeks now; she’s been stronger than me, to be honest.
I could write volumes on my often tumultuous relationship with my mother but I’m not up to writing at all, so now that I’ve provided you with an explanation for my absence, I’m going to attempt to get back to my life. Such as it is.
The weight has been unbearable, especially when I think of what I’ve lost in the past few years, but others carry far more weight and have done so for far longer so who am I to complain?
By the way, I need to publicly acknowledge my beautiful bride for being my rock; she’s been the best damn daughter-in-law anyone ever had as well. Watching Mom slowly fade away has stirred a lot of painful memories in my wife but she keeps going with a smile and a will of iron.
You’ll see me tweeting occasionally. (We all have our coping mechanisms. Mine happens to be cheaper than booze, smokes and pharmaceuticals.)
See you in the lobby, kids…
POSTSCRIPT: Ironically, WordPress has just informed me that this lame-ass excuse for a post is actually #1,000 in the annals of Hook history. (I’m so glad I spelled “annals” right.)
I know this hasn’t been my best work, but enjoy, you filthy animals…