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Tag Archives: Ellen DeGeneres
The Hook’s Aluminum Rules of Travel: Part One.
(What? You think I can afford gold on a bellman’s salary?) “I want you to be nice.. until it’s time to… not be nice.” – The late Patrick Swayze as James Dalton in the 1989 white trash classic flick, … Continue reading
Posted in Hotel Life
Tagged Advice, Ann Landers, Ellen DeGeneres, Lady Gaga, sex, The Big Bang Theory, travel, travel tips
35 Comments
More Canadian Lily and Lobby Confessions.
Yes, I know “Canadian Lily” sounds like a brand of alcohol, but I was in the zone. Shut up. If you haven’t read Lily Morgan’s 5×5 installment yet, you’re cheating yourself. Go back and do it – NOW! Lily … Continue reading
Miley, Missed Opportunities, and Bits ‘n Bites of Wisdom From The Hook.
It is 7 am. It is Monday. The midnight bellman has just informed me of the presence of a young, nubile, completely naked female in her twenties who found herself locked out of her room on the 25th floor. And … Continue reading
Posted in Hotel Life
Tagged bus tours, Ellen DeGeneres, Japanese tourists, miley cyrus, Mondays, Saturday Night Live, SNL, twerking
93 Comments
Not Being Kryptonian Sucks.
EARLY, FAR TOO EARLY, SUNDAY, SEPT. 1, 2013: The skies are clear, the sun is shining like a super star and the natives are beginning to stir from their alcohol/party/passion-induced slumber. The valet deck will soon stink of fossil fuels, … Continue reading
“Thank You” Will Never Be Enough, But It’s All I Can Afford on a Bellman’s Salary.
My daughter loves Discoms; she can’t get enough of them. (“Discoms” is a registered trademark of Hook Inc. At least it would be, if I knew how to register such things. Either way, feel free to use the term, but … Continue reading
Posted in Hotel Life
Tagged blogging, Ellen DeGeneres, emergency rooms, ERs, Le Clown, Niagara Falls, Sarah, summer, The Ellen DeGeneres Show, The Hook, tourists
80 Comments
An Open Letter To Ellen DeGeneres
Dearest Ellen, Hello. How are you? That’s great to hear, seriously. Listen, I know you’ve got a full plate in front of you right now (Okay, maybe not literally; you don’t look like you eat that much, to be honest. … Continue reading
Posted in Hotel Life
Tagged CoverGirl, Ellen, Ellen DeGeneres, kids, Parenting, SofĂa Vergara, The Misadventures of Misery
573 Comments