100 Reasons To Not Kill Yourself #45.

If visiting the dentist is one of your reasons for living then today’s topic will really light your fire.

Or to be more accurate, it will really make your dentist happy – eventually. But that’s the future. This series is all about living for the moment and enjoying the little things that can make today so worthwhile. And what helps us savor the moment more than…

#45: Candy!

Between the 6th and 4th centuries BCE, (so before my time but not Kris Jenner’s) the Persians (the ones known for their carpets) followed by the Greeks (the ones known for smashing plates) discovered the people in India and their “reeds that produce honey without bees”. They stole adopted and then spread sugar and sugarcane agriculture. Pieces of sugar were produced by boiling sugarcane juice in ancient India and consumed as Khanda, dubbed as the original candy and the etymology of the word. (Learning is fun, kids!)

Before the Industrial Revolution, candy was often considered a form of medicine, either used to calm the digestive system or cool a sore throat. In the 1830s the candy store became a staple of the child of the American working class. Penny candies epitomized this transformation and became the first material good that children spent their own money on. For this reason, candy store-owners relied almost entirely on the business of children to keep them running. (I told you learning was fun, What, did you think I was lying?)

I’ll never forget being a kid and being dragged along accompanying my mother and grandmother to our local Sears store for hours of mind-numbing shopping. Fortunately, Sears had a massive candy counter with four sides that was strategically placed in the center of the first floor so there was no way shoppers were avoiding that sucker. It was a candy trap of the highest and most devious order.


Let the stroke commence…

Sears Canada is gone now; the victim of corporate greed and amateurish management, but fortunately for me the memories have outlasted my cavities. And I still enjoy an occasional bite or two of candy.

Sure, too much candy will rot your teeth and make you a footless diabetic, but too much of anything (yes, even coitus) will kill you eventually, so why not relive some fond childhood memories associated with whichever candy speaks to you and savor the moment? Literally.

After all, clinging to and enjoying the little things can keep you alive for one more day and that day can make all the difference in the world.

See you in the lobby, friends…

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
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19 Responses to 100 Reasons To Not Kill Yourself #45.

  1. nbratscott says:

    Oh Baby Hook, now you’re talking…or writing, as it were…

  2. Food…… sweets…… chocolate!! My dentist hasn’t found my sweet tooth to remove it yet.
    Jelly babies, liquorice allsorts, fruit pastilles, candy floss…………….. lead me to your counter!

  3. Mmmm. Sweets. Love them. The irony is, eating candy doesn’t cause diabetes. Just an old wives tail.

  4. One of the things we left behind is Winton’s Candy Shop. Penny (now dollar) candy at its best. Good post, Hook. Good reason to stick around too.

  5. Doug in Oakland says:

    When I was the warehouse manager for a natural foods wholesaler/distributor called Tumbleweed, we carried several varieties of candy that were normally out of my price range, and this occasionally allowed me to sample them… Like the time Lee accidentally rammed the Lindt pallet with the forklift and I was like “Well what are we waiting for? Lets see what you broke… #255 raspberry truffles, oh hell yes!”
    These says I still eat some candy, mostly from the dollar store, where right now you can get a 5 ounce bag of chocolate Easter eggs for a buck, or a Whitman’s chocolate bar for eighty cents.
    My teeth aren’t good, but I don’t think candy has much to do with that, and according to my doctor, my blood sugar is still “on the high end of normal” so I’m not giving up my two remaining vices, candy and strawberry soda, just yet.

  6. Jennie says:

    A yummy post! 🙂

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