I’m no expert but I would think that a mother for whom the safety of her brood is supposedly-paramount would exercise extreme caution when carrying out said protection.
Case in point: a mommy dearest who, in her zeal to protect her young (nineish-going-on-thirty) whiter-than-Brooke-Shields son from the “evil bellman and his rolling bellcart of death”, yanked said child by the hood of his Sears brand winter coat. Sadly, her “cure” was far worse than the “disease”, and her child went flying backwards – his feet actually left the ground – before landing flat on his back. The little guy’s expression said it all but he elaborated nonetheless:
“What the hell? What did you do, bitch?”
Yep, the little fella has obviously been watching far too much BET. Still, he was the highlight of the March Break check-out frenzy… and considering the crowd we got this year, that’s saying something. His creator was stunned, but I found the words:
“The worst part is… he was nowhere near me!”
I’m a little dickens, aren’t I?
See you in the lobby, kids…