It’s been a strange week, to say the least.
However, since the bulk of the weirdness occurred on hotel property, most of the details must remain between me and my Hello Kitty pocket diary.
With one glaring, depressing, soul-crushing exception.
Regular readers of this site and my award-winning (in my mind) Twitter feed know that I’ve been trying to get my book, The Bellman Chronicles, made into a television series. This has been a goal of mine for many years. This has been a goal of mine that I have failed at in spectacular fashion for many years.
CBC took eight months to respond to my pitch – and eight seconds to infuriate me with their response.
(Other agencies and networks haven’t even responded so I guess CBC isn’t so bad after all.)
Any and all contacts I’ve had in the entertainment industry have been too busy – or disinterested – to help me out.
Even colleagues with similar goals haven’t been able to lend a hand.
In short, I’ve been completely adrift and ridiculously-out-of-my-league lost.
Then certain forces within the hotel became concerned this blog’s focus was going to become a problem someday. (The less said about that the better.) And so I’ve switched gears. Granted, my enthusiasm for blogging has been diminished by 99%, but I’m still here, doing… to be honest, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing anymore. But I’m still here.
But maybe not for long.
The point of all this joy is this: I woke up one day and a colleague sent me a link to YouTube video that has left me gutted to my core.
Imagine that part of yourself that you retreat to whenever life begins to overwhelm you. Now imagine having to abandon that place because of someone else’s dream.
To be clear, I realize anyone can tell stories about bellmen. I get it. In fact, under different circumstances I’d be rooting for these guys. But under these circumstances – and nothing personal against these talented folks – I feel conflicted to say the least.
At this moment, part of me wants very much to die.
To be clear, I recognize that I have a good life. No, scratch that, I have a great life. My beautiful wife is the love of my life. Our daughter is a brilliant human being that leaves us awestruck every day. Even the dog is a helluva character that enriches our days and nights immeasurably. My bills are paid, my mortgage has been deleted, and my bank account is in the black. (For now, at least.) I believe my penis to be of slightly-above average size.
At the end of the day I’m lucky as hell to be The Hook.
But I’m also human and it hurts like hell when it looks like my dreams are never going to be fully realized.
Still, I’m here, swinging away. Even if all my plans never reach fruition, I can only complain so much, right?
See you in the lobby, kids…
(No one’s taken that from me yet.)