I rarely discuss my offspring on social media, for several good reasons.
1) Any father worth his salt knows better than to violate his teenage daughter’s privacy – unless he wants to unleash a firestorm of screaming/ranting/destruction of household property.
2) My wife, ever the fiercely-protective mother, has a helluva right hook.
But the following events are by no means exclusive to my humble home. In fact, many of you will recognize a typical morning in the Hookey household as a typical morning in your own.
7 AM: I wake from a from-blissful-slumber (the dog has developed the far-from-cute habit of “requesting” to be put out in the middle of the night), to begin the arduous/hazardous task of getting my child out of a coma brought on by late nights of writing, homework and NCIS binge-watching.
7:02: I carefully open my daughter’s door and inform her the time has come for her to join the waking world. Her reaction?
“Uh…”
Yes, it’s a bit underwhelming, isn’t it? Her groan is so low, it takes months of training to even register it within human parameters. She then pulls the sheets over her head and returns to the Dreamscape. I return to my room.
VAMPIRELOVER: Did you wake the kid?
ME: I certainly tried.
7:10: My second attempt.
“Uh… Skippy! Leave me alone!”
An octave higher but no closer to success, I’m afraid.
7:30: The wife, dog and I are downstairs preparing ourselves for the day ahead. Well, the wife and I are; the dog can usually be found licking herself, eating or humping a stuffed animal, all of which give her great satisfaction.
7:33: My daughter finally appears… looking as though she lost a fight with God.
ME: Morning, kiddo! Want some breakfast?
“Uh!”
ME: That’s a “no”, I’m assuming?
“Uh!”
ME: So you’re good?
“Uh!”
At this point, my wife intercedes and pulls me out of there before all Hell breaks loose.
It should be noted that my daughter is an above-average student, an animal lover, a wonderful human being and the best damn kid I could ever ask for.
But in the end, she’s only human… and definitely not a morning person.
See you in the lobby, kids…
I’m not a morning puppy… and neither is my Yorkie! LOL! When hubby (the morning person in our household) attempts to wake us up, he gets the exact same reaction!! ha ha ha ha!!! 😉
Well, misery loves company so…
And there you go! ha ha! 😉
Uh! My two dogs have suddenly decided that going out at 3 a.m. is urgent, so they can take care of (Loudly) any horrible beasts that might be lying in wait in the backyard to kill us while we sleep. We are seriously considering moving their posh beds out of our bedroom.
Might not be a bad idea…
Uh! Are we supposed to outgrow that? I think my parents may have left something out… 😉
Everyone’s different, Nina.
You’re perfect the way you are.
I keep telling people that… for some reason, they just snicker in response! lol 😉
I’ll be dealing with this very soon I fear
You can handle it, trust me.
Middle of the night doggy calls are the worst, thankfully, my husband is wonderful for getting up in the middle of the night. As for your teenager, she will eventually figure out that mornings aren’t all that bad. Good for her for being awesome and having great grades.
She’s a credit to her age group.
Must have gotten it from her Mom…
Her humour from dad?
Pretty much.
You are so right. Happens in every house.
I knew it!
🙂
I hate to tell you this, Hook. But I was never a layabed teen. Up and about, breakfast, school. Or on a Saturday, do the family shopping. Without a list. I remembered
Nicely done!
I love this because it reminds me when I was still living at home and Dad and I both used to get up super early for work. My response was pretty much “ugh” to anything he’d try and say too.
Sounds about right.
And if I might say so, you turned out beautifully, Carly!
Mornings suck! The worst part is getting my kiddos up and ready for school. If I could hire a nanny just for mornings, I would! :-).
I found your blog on The Bloggess’ site. I am a new blogger and looking for feedback from successful blogger’s if you have time to visit. My newest post is Ode to The Bloggess. What are your favorite blogs? I’ll be back for more and I’ll sign up for your email’s.
I’ll get over there soon… promise!