My New Reality.

On March 11, at approximately 1:10 am, I watched the greatest man I’ve ever known slip away from this world.

His passing was peaceful, with only the relentless hiss of an oxygen tube filling the room. His passing was without pain, a merciful coma ensured he would no longer have to suffer the trials of COPD and pneumonia. His passing was observed by three family members, of which I was one. Until that morning I had never watched another human being leave this world, much less one that had such an impact on my life.

To the world, Jack Fisher was my father-in-law, but for all intents and purposes I lost the only true father I’ve ever known when he drew his last breath. He had made my house a home. He had made my family complete. He had made me a man by his example.

There is so much I want to say about John Edward “Jack” Fisher, but I find my self broken inside, my creativity severed from my consciousness, seemingly forever.

The house is quiet at the moment. My family is gone to the movies and this is the first time I’ve touched the computer in over a week. It feels… “wrong” is the only word that comes to mind… for the house to be void of the constant mechanical breathing of an oxygen machine and the presence of an 87-year-old man with more fire and gumption than anyone I’ve ever encountered.

But this is our new reality. We did all we could for Dad when he was with us. I hope it was enough. For now, I am stepping back, from work and the virtual world. There is nothing more to say; I simply don’t have the words. I’m sure they’ll come eventually. I’m sure I’ll be be back sooner or later.

But not today.