5×5 With The Hook: Chowderhead.

You requested that some beefcake be added to your 5×5 menu, but how about some chowder instead?

On the mean virtual streets of the blogosphere, he’s THE MAN, the one you want to be, the one who has lived the blogging experience to the fullest. I kid you, not this cat has seen and done things that constitute the ultimate blogging fantasy. He’s formed lasting connections and crated virtual playgrounds that are flourishing. He is Adam Sendek, his moniker is Chowderhead and he is my most honored guest today.

This guy has been an innovator from the get-go; he has his own dictionary, he is a valued staff member at Long Awkward Pause, he has mad banner production skills and I’m given to understand that he is a gentle and considerate lover; a young lady will always wake up in his bed with cab fare affixed to her forehead and a breath-cleansing mint taped to her pillow.

He’s genuinely funny, generous with his time and contrary to Ned Hickson’s protestations to the contrary, he’s a decent guy.

(Admit it, you’re still giggling over “member” aren’t you? Yes, it’s another word for penis. Grow up, people!)

Let’s get to this, shall we?

1) Your personal greatest blogging moment is…

…floating around in space somewhere right now because it hasn’t happened yet.

   Every night before I go to bed I say a prayer to Michelle Weber, asking her to contact me about a Daily Post interview. I’m not losing sleep over it. In fact, I’ve been sleeping very soundly lately. Still waiting for the beeper to go off. Still waiting. ANY minute now. Michelle. You’re not listening to me. Michelle. Any…minute now.

   Actually, the Long Awkward Pause group interview on WordPress news was definitely the coolest by far. I like doing interviews. This is the second one. They’re particularly cool too when I don’t have to ask someone to interview me, so thank you.

(You’re doing me the favor, buddy. The ladies were getting restless.)

2) Do you think romance is dead? (Yes, this is your chance to really impress the ladies, but be honest, regardless of what public reaction may be.)

   If by ‘romance’ you mean some guy in a plaid suit and bow tie throwing rocks at some chicks window, and then reading her a love note, then yes, it’s deader than Keith Richards’ face. That kinda stuff leads to restraining orders nowadays. Everybody’s different though I guess. If anything it’s just redefined. More texting or something.

   Can I trade this question in for another one?

(NO SUBSTITUTIONS!)

3) Let’s imagine you’re a superhero, Chowderhead; assuming you had your pick of sidekicks from the blogosphere, who would you choose?

   Ok, but we can answer this question without imagining, because Chowderhead is not real so technically (he?) I already am kind of a superhero…that writes blog posts on an iPad while laying on the couch.

…but to answer your question, any of the LAP writers would work. And I don’t just say that because this was the perfect shameless plug opportunity, I really mean it. Ned Hickson, Chris De Voss, and Singlegirlie. We would be called Sax-men, and our weapons would be saxophones that none of us know how to play. Everybody in the Sax-men would have to where a spandex uniform too, except for me, because I’m the leader in this group of superheroes so I make the rules.

   Hubba hubba, Ned!

(If that pic doesn’t satisfy the ladies, I don’t know what will. Either way, I’m done.)

4) If you could start your life over as someone else, would you?

   If given the choice, I’d rather start over as an inanimate object. But I’d have to put some thought into what object I’d want to be.

   I definitely wouldn’t want be a motel room comforter – that’s outta the question (I’m sure you agree). Um, probably not a subway toilet either (everybody agrees). Not a soccer or basketball either because I’d have reoccurring concussions all the time…

   Ok, screw the inanimate object idea. I’d want to be myself again, but I’d do lots of things the opposite way that I did them the first time. That bowl cut hairdo in the second grade was so stupid, stupid, stupid! And that time I got an acorn stuck in my nose (true story) that was stupid too. That story is gonna be around for awhile I think.

5) Do you think you’re better than me?

    Well, I started to write the word “no”, and then I remembered that you were Canadian, so I had to change my answer to a definitive “yes”.

   No, I do not think I’m better than you. But my hockey team is better than yours for sure.

(BURN!)

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

And on that note, ladies and gentleman, I think it’s time to hit the virtual road. My thanks to our kick-ass guest for raising my blog’s cool factor exponentially.

See you in the lobby, kids…