5×5 With The Hook: Emily of The Waiting

She’s a wife, a mom, a good egg and a helluva writer.

She is Emily. (It’s like Cher. Or Madonna. Or Jesus. Except she isn’t old, washed-up or dead.) She is real and spectacular simultaneously. A quick visit to her Home page reveals a gal that’s been around the block – virtually, that is. Honestly, Emily is ridiculously well-traveled when it comes to the writing biz and I envy the hell out of her.

And not to dwell, but she actually takes pride in being the best damn mom she can be. I’ve observed millions – at least – of mothers from the hospitality trenches and I have to say, a good portion of them are way off their game while traveling. Granted, the term “family vacation” is the most horrible of all oxymorons, but many of the ladies I see could definitely step it up a notch. Rip a page from Emily’s book, ladies, and pour your heart and soul into everything you do.

And that, friends, is Emily in a virtual nutshell: A gal who gives everything she’s got to whatever she does. And now, I think it’s time to hear from the lady herself, don’t you?

1) Use five colors to describe your life journey so far.

   My childhood was yellow and bright. I was very blessed to be surrounded by people who loved me and built me up from a young age.

   Of course, by the time I was an adolescent, I still found something to rebel against because, guys, it’s so hard to go to private school, live in a safe neighborhood, and have parents who emotionally support you. For those years I chose black.

   ANGST. College and grad school have a brownish sepia tint to them because I loved studying anything that was old, archaic, and a little weathered.

   Then adulthood came and I married my husband, and kelly green was the color I chose for my bridesmaids’ dresses.

   Nowadays, as the mom of a toddler, I’m tempted to chose the lovely shades of body fluids as a hallmark of where I am. However, I like to look at the glass as half full so I chose crisp, white light in honor of the girl who gets me up early enough to actually see it.  

2)  Your favorite Britcom is…

   This is SUCH a hard one for me because British comedies are my kryptonite. As far as I’m concerned, BBC America exists solely for my own edification, and all the rest of you suckers are just along for the ride. I am a huge fan of Are You Being Served?, As Time Goes By, Shameless, and The Vicar of Dibley. But there is a very special place in my heart for Keeping Up Appearances starring Patricia Routledge as the social ladder-climbing Hyacinth Bucket (It’s pronounced BOUQUET!).

3)  Being a nerd is fun: Describe your fantasy super-spy identity. 

   Little-known fact: I actually AM a spy and there is absolutely nothing fantasy about it. I discovered my own abilities when I was able to open a cellophane packet of Pop-Tarts and consume their contents without my two-year-old daughter Cee ever noticing. I think the word you’re looking for is “ninja.”

THE PERFECT COVER?

4)  Being a mom isn’t all heart-swelling moments and rainbows; what does it take to lift your spirits when things get dark and hazy?

   TV. Pure and simple. For me, writing and parenting are actually very similar because both can overwhelm mi if I dwell in my own head for too long. I tend to over-think things and the best thing for me to do when I’ve had an especially trying day is to just veg out with Netflix with my husband after our daughter has gone to bed. The cussier the show, the better. Louis CK is my secret lover.

(Not anymore, I’m afraid.)

5)  Your favorite meal – that you don’t have to prepare – is…

   Korean food. Eaaaaaasily.  I lived in Korea for two years and the tastes I associate with it produce an overwhelming feeling of warm-fuzzies in my gullet, and try as I might to reproduce some of my favorite dishes at home back in the US, they are just not the same when they’re prepared by an ajuma.  I love sam gyup sal (grilled porkbelly), japchae noodles (glass noodles with beef, veggies, and sesame oil), and dolsot bibimhap (rice and veggies in a steaming hotpot).

   And lord, the kimchi.  GIVE ME ALL THE KIMCHI AND NO ONE GETS HURT.

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Yeah, that’s all I have for you today, kiddies. I have comics to read, bags to deliver and a life to lead… somewhere. I think I’m going to let Emily’s progeny, Cee, see us out. Get it?

I know. They can’t all be zingers, okay? Shut up. 

See you in the lobby after your nap, folks…