5×5 With The Hook: Helena Hann-Basqu​iat

The most important element in creating a successful blog – in my not-so-humble-opinion – is identity; you have to release your true “voice” or at the very least, create one that readers will buy into instantly.

Our guest today has a voice that is unmistakeably hers. Actually, she has two. How cool is that? I mean, I write as “The Hook” but that’s me through and through. Helena has created two distinct personalities and she manages them both flawlessly.

Her blog’s “About” page is textbook worthy and worth ripping off emulating. And to top it all off, she has a Kickstarter campaign underway and if you click here, she’ll tell you all about it while entertaining you, ‘natch.

Her Table O’Contents page is a great place to start if you want to understand Helena the writer. And if you want to more.. well, ask her yourself, will ya? I’ve got guests to serve, household chores to make a mess of and if I have time, comic books to read, so I can’t do everything for you, kids.



1)  I’m a hardcore geek through and through so this first question is the product of my nerd mind.  Who is more fun to watch onscreen: the hero or the villain?

    If we’re talking superheroes, I’m going to have to be a dirty girl and say the hero — ’cause they’re usually wearing skin tight costumes that really don’t leave a lot to the imagination. But usually I’d have to say the villain — if they are written well, and given enough sympathy to make you almost root for them to succeed. (Actually, I often want to see a movie end with everyone losing, rather than the usual happily ever afters Hollywood produces)

2)  Where in the landscape of her mind does Helena travel to when she needs to get it from it all? 

   Like, my mind palace? Wow… good question. I travel to this ice palace, where my breath is recycled special effects from the film Titanic, and alternatively Helena Bonham-Carter or a penguin is waiting for me there, urging me to SLIDE. Oh wait, no, that’s not me, that’s someone else. Me, I retreat in my mind to this little cafe in Mill Valley, California, where waits a perfect cup of coffee and pastries so fresh that the butter’s still wet on them. Mmmm.

3)  Pet shaming is ridiculously popular these days.  Does your heart swell when you see “cute” animal pics or do you feel like sicking the Humane Society – or a couple of rabid dobermans – on the owners of these members of the animal kingdom?

   I’m going to sound sour here, darling, but I’ve never been terribly impressed with what people use the internet for. It’s supposed to be a venue for an exchange of ideas; it has the potential to connect us as a planet like never before. Instead of using it for the betterment of womankind, we share pictures of cats doing silly things and putting illiterate captions beneath them. We use it for pornography and bullying. 

   So, that’s me being serious, darling… what was your next question?

4)  Your favorite Monkee is… 

   Ah, that would have to be Yorrick, the cute little Capuchin from Y: The Last Man… oh, but of course, you mean Monkee, as in Hey Hey, we’re the…. To be honest, I was never that big a fan… they were like the Fake Beatles. But if I had to choose, I’d say Michael Nesmith, ’cause his mom invented Liquid Paper, which was my first introduction to chemically enhanced dizziness in grade school.

   Hey, did you know that famous rocker Stephen Stills (of later Crosby Stills & Nash fame) auditioned for the Monkees, but then dropped out when they told him they wouldn’t be writing their own songs?True story.

   Also, David Bowie, nee David Jones, changed his name to Bowie because he didn’t want to be confused with Davey Jones of The Monkees. Also a true story.

   Did you also know that I once slept with David Bowie? Not a true story, but oh, my, if only it were…

5)  They say you should never play favorites.  I say different.  Who is your favorite person?

   Oh, I have a lot of favorite people, darling. My absolute most favorite person in the whole big beautiful world is the Countess Penelope of Arcadia, no question.

Ladies and Gentlemen: The Countess Penelope of Arcadia

   Some of my other favorite people, in no particular order: Spider-man, Jack White, Dr. Seuss, David Bowie, Gary Oldman, the barista at My Dog Joe, Amanda Palmer, Neil Gaiman, Bob Dylan, Andy Warhol, Captain Kirk, Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Beefheart, Morrissey, Cait Blanchett, Kate Heidke-Miller, Katie Sullivan, Katherine Hepburn, Kate Bush, Kate Winslet, Kate Beckinsale — if only for Underworld, Kate Hudson – if only for Almost Famous… and finally, Kate from the Ben Folds Five song, whoever she is….


All right, that about wraps up this latest 5×5 mind-trip. Helena is a real gift, isn’t she? Before I forget – and she kicks my ass nine ways to Sunday – I need to tell about Helena’s literary gift to the masses…

Volume One will be available Spring 2014 — official date TBA 

e-book cover

And that’s all for today, folks. See you in the lobby…

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
This entry was posted in Hotel Life and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

25 Responses to 5×5 With The Hook: Helena Hann-Basqu​iat

  1. Nadia says:

    I’m so happy I ran into your blog recently, Helena… I mean, darling. I hung onto every word of this 5×5. David Bowie. Pastries. Butter. Sigh.

    • Helena Hann-Basquiat says:

      Your name simply cries out to be suffixed by the word darling. Like a Bond villainess, or perhaps a re-boot of Rocky and Bullwinkle. “Nadia, darling, bring me the no-good-niks!”

  2. zen city says:

    well done!

  3. I’m a newcomer to Helena’s world and already sticking around to see where it unfolds. Looking forward to the book! And thanks for those questions…illuminating. We’ve already bonded over Morrissey, but Gary Oldman is another cat I can really dribble over too 🙂

    Great to see the wonderful woman herself here…thanks for this !

    • Helena Hann-Basquiat says:

      Recently saw the greatest thing ever — Gary Oldman directed (and co-starred) in a promotional video with Jack White to promote his solo album. It’s about 11 minutes of heaven.

  4. Helena Hann-Basquiat says:

    Reblogged this on Being the Memoirs of Helena Hann-Basquiat, Dilettante. and commented:
    Interview With a Non-Vampire — check out my interview with The Hook, who may not be a vampire (much to his wife’s dismay) but is certainly a chilly cool cat nonetheless. Oh, and I just learned he’s from Niagara Falls, so we’ve probably passed each other in comic book stores and not realized it.

  5. Twindaddy says:

    I only recently discovered Helena through her guest post for Aussa. I’ve been very impressed thus far.

  6. Trent Lewin says:

    Very good, Hook. I’ve seen some of Helena’s stuff around, on I think Aussa’s blog – she’s a really good writer, and look forward to seeing more of her. Will have to check out this Kickstarter too, not entirely sure what that’s for, but I figure you got to support cool voices. Also, I figure that if I ever met this lady, she may wither me with a glare… and that I’d likely have it coming (or believe that I did). I think that’s meant to be a compliment.

    • Helena Hann-Basquiat says:

      Thanks, Trent — Do drop by and see what the Kickstarter’s all about, I’d really appreciate you taking five minutes! I do tend to have that effect on men, darling — that they can’t help but be…. MEN around me, and then the glares begin. Thanks for the compliment.

      • Trent Lewin says:

        I will do so. Funny enough, I just posted about men and women and everything in between… I’m not frankly sure how to categorize you. But I will drop by, you’re fun.

  7. The internet ‘is supposed to be a venue for an exchange of ideas; it has the potential to connect us as a planet like never before.’ Yes, yes, yes. I’m so glad that there are people out there who believe and can articulate that! Cheers for Helena wooo!

    • Helena Hann-Basquiat says:

      I read a great comment recently – Facebook’s where I go for my daily dose of misanthropy.
      I don’t want to hate people — ergo, I have to be really careful where I go on the internet.
      I’d love to have my faith in humanity restored and rewarded at some point. I’ll take small victories like meeting people like you, darling.

  8. Jennie Saia says:

    Sexy and profound: a tasty combination.

  9. Veronica says:

    Hmm, two personalities, mine have a way of blending a little too much into each other. I like your style Helena.

    • Helena Hann-Basquiat says:

      I love your name. Whether from a childhood love of Archie comics or because of the Elvis Costello song, I can’t say. But the next time I create a pseudonym, I’m totally taking Veronica.

      • Veronica says:

        I’ve always liked the name, so when the time came and I was choosing a pseudonym, it was perfect. There’s just something about the name that is straight out cool.

  10. We should all have a thimble full of Helena’s chutzpah! I like her style.

  11. curvyroads says:

    Hook, you’ve done it again!
    Great interview with a fascinating lady (ladies?)! I am totally hooked (sorry) on Helena, and Jessica.

  12. Pingback: What? What Are People Saying About Me? | Being the Memoirs of Helena Hann-Basquiat, Dilettante.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s