The New year has barely begun and the lobby is quiet, kids, devoid of activity and the human suffering that is surely on its way.
Soon the two most hollow words in the English language will be uttered by hundreds of weary, still-intoxicated hotel guests.
As I sit here composing this message to all of you, the first Hooker Walk of Pride of 2014 is unfolding before my eyes.
(Actually, its more like a Shuffle of Pride, as the prostitute in question is circling the lobby waiting for a cab. Hopefully she’ll be headed home to delouse and disinfect.)
She is statuesque, with platinum locks, teased to requisite perfection. Her fur coat looks relatively new and her abbreviated crimson dress appears to have survived her shift intact. All in all, the young lady in question appears none the worse for the wear.
Listen closely though, and you can actually hear the wind blowing through the lobby via the revolving door make its way through her ears. Her eyes have no doubt seen sights that would turn the average soul off sex for years, but they’ve retained that youthful spark nonetheless.
I’ll say this: She may be a whore but she earned a helluva lot more than yours truly walked away with last night. Of course, one can only assume she worked a helluva a lot harder for her pay.
And with that bit of commentary and reflection, I bid adieu to you, my gentle readers. Duty calls – to be exact, its Room 1906, but you get the point, right?
Happy New Year, kids.
Now go Google those hang-over remedies…
To be honest, I am quite reluctant to share this with you but I feel a sobering dose of reality can only serve the greater good in the long run. Plus, this is how I’m wired, so there’s that.
A young maintenance worker who was unfortunate enough to find himself assigned to the dreaded New Year’s Eve shift – on his birthday, no less – received a call that will haunt him for the rest of his days. A guest required help retrieving her friend who had locked herself in the bathroom. Sounds simple enough, doesn’t it?
A simple manipulation of a screwdriver opened the door – and revealed a young lady laying in a pool of her own blood. Her suicide aborted, the young lady was coherent when emergency workers wheeled her out of the hotel to begin the long road to recovery.
And that’s all I have to say about this incident, folks.
Just the truth. Make of it what you will.