The Hook Meets The Seven Foxes!

THE SCENE: A crowded lobby, a crowd of guests are waiting not-so patiently for a an elevator. One finally arrives and a veteran bellman departs and is greeted by a group of single white females carrying four pieces of luggage each – and plenty of baggage…

FOX #1: Excuse me, sir, we’re completely lost! We’ve been around the hotel three times and we still can’t find the fourth floor…

THE HOOK: There’s a good reason for that.

FOX #2: Which is?

THE HOOK: We don’t have a fourth floor. Which room are you looking for, ladies?

FOX #3: Room 4754 (that isn’t the real number, of course, but just go with it!)

THE HOOK: Room 4754? So why are you looking for the fourth floor?

The group of seven whispered among themselves, desperately attempting to formulate an answer, as though they were competing on Jeopardy. Had they been, Alex Trebek would have had them executed for their own good.

FOX #4: Well, the room number is 4754, so the room must be on the fourth floor, right? That’s only logical, right?

THE HOOK: Well, that depends.

FOX# 1: On what?

THE HOOK: On the answer to the following question: have you ladies been drinking, by any chance?

FOX #5: (Giggling like a schoolgirl) Not yet!

THE HOOK: Take my advice, it won’t hurt to start. Room 4754 is on the forty-seventh floor, ladies. (I procured them an elevator) Good luck to you.

FOX #6: Thanks! This is my bachelorette party. I’m getting married!

THE HOOK: He’s a lucky… well, best of luck to you both!

The future Real Housewives departed, leaving me standing with a small group of wide-eyed guests who were as shocked and amused as I was. In fact, one of them decided to vocalize her feelings about the entire incident…

“I hope she’s good on her knees, because she’s as dumb as a post!”

You have to love sweet blue-haired grandmothers traveling with their three young grandchildren.

And that was my Saturday. How was yours?

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
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65 Responses to The Hook Meets The Seven Foxes!

  1. ROFL! Wow! Which, I can’t say anything, I would probably be on the 4th floor walking around, till I figured out that after the number 4 is only 3 more numbers, or so. I’m spacey but It does finally “click in” after awhile.
    Thanks for the laugh Hook.

  2. rebecca2000 says:

    LMAO I love that a grandma said that. I love cute dumb people, they make want to hug them.

  3. Jennifer says:

    LMAO “Dumb as a post”, c’mon, posts aren’t even that dumb. Wonder how long that marriage will last?

  4. filledandfooled says:

    I can’t figure out why there is no 4th floor though, but wow, you work in a huge place!

  5. JackieP says:

    bwahahaha! I’m not a little old lady, close, but not there yet, but it sounds like something I would have said. 😉

  6. Blown says:

    What’s not to like…?

  7. twindaddy says:

    I wish I had thought to keep a blog when I worked with the public on a daily basis. I would’ve been able to tell stories like this all the time.

  8. MissFourEyes says:

    I love those crazy-haired grandmothers, they always say the best things

  9. But still, why WAS there no fourth floor?

    Have you read Hotel Babylon?

    • The Hook says:

      That’s just the way the hotel is laid out; the guest floors in that particular tower start at the seventh floor for some reason. And no, i haven’t read Hotel Babylon. Thanks for the input, Vanessa.

  10. Happy Runner says:

    Congratulations! I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. Check it out here:

  11. Ok Hook – where’s the 4th floor? Does it start with the 10th? Is this a weird Canadian thang?

  12. loiswstern says:

    My Saturday? Not as amusing as yours, but fun nonetheless. Enjoyed your bit of levity here!

  13. mairedubhtx says:

    Good to see the family is well enough for you to be back at work and that things haven’t changed much. Young ladies are still clueless. Grandmas are still wise. You are still stoic. All’s right with the world.

  14. “I hope she’s good on her knees, because she’s as dumb as a post!” Ah ha ha ha ha ha. Leave it to us gray haired grandmas to call it like we see it.

  15. Michael says:

    Gee, my Saturday wasn’t anything like that at all. Sometimes I wish I worked in a hotel instead of a law library. 🙂

  16. Oh, the wild life you track down.
    Great description: “desperately attempting to formulate an answer, as though they were competing on Jeopardy.”

  17. And you want people to visit? This is what happens.

  18. Jo Bryant says:

    I love grannies with quick wits…but I don’t get why there is no fourth floor either

  19. Sweet Fancy Moses, I would have given anything to hear a granny making a comment about the girl being good on her knees. Bless her, that’s the kind of thing I would say. Because I was actually thinking it as I read this.

  20. Kim says:

    Oh, the people you will meet…

  21. When In The City!! says:

    LoL…makes ya love getting up in the morning to go to work, doesn’t it?!

  22. jastilwell says:

    Every time you write about work, it makes me wish I could share some of my stories. Damn rules of confidentiality.
    Did they tip at least?

  23. Love your entertaining stories, Hook! How do you keep from laughing out loud in the face of some of these people? Or do you? 😉

  24. Hahahahaha! I think you just met me in the future as a grandmother.

  25. My Saturday was very nice, Thank You my dear Hook….! We (partner and I) are back to ‘twirling the light fantastic’ around the dance floor (and what a joy that is)…!
    As for the Grandmother with grandchildren: Isn’t it wonderful what we can ‘get away with’ the older we get…. I can enjoy so much more as I gracefully age. Young men are free to ‘kiss me’ and ‘cuddle me’ and tell me how wonderful I am… Yes, my dear Hook; this aging process has its benefits…! 😉

  26. When you write about your work stories, it makes me wish I could tell the world about my job on a daily basis. Damn rules of confidentiality.

    • The Hook says:

      I hear you, J! I’m actually very fortunate my work hasn’t crossed any of my employers’ guidelines – yet!

      • I don’t know why I posted twice…it’s like I’m stalking you:) Or I am very confused as to why it posted with a WordPress account and then I couldn’t find it. Or I suck at anything related to social media. Yup..that’s it.
        All I know is that I will never assume the bellman doesn’t have a blog ever again.

      • The Hook says:

        You’re in good company, J: I have the prettiest stalkers! And that’s a great plan; never underestimate the bellman!
        Also, you definitely don’t suck at navigating the social media waters; you’ve been on Katie and Jeff, remember? You’re a smashing success, young lady! By the way, did you get my recent e-mail?

  27. Confessions of Your Husband's Mistress says:

    You always make the best of every situation! Didn’t you want to send them in search of the 4th floor one more time?

  28. Haw haw haw! “He’s a lucky… well, best of luck to you both!”

  29. legendsofgreenisle says:

    That’s crazy!!!! LOL!

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