HOOK’S NOTE: Staffing levels are decimated during this time of the year, so there are only two of us on during the day – except when one of us calls in sick. Then The Hook is an army of one. Thank God it’s deader than Sarah Palin’s chances of obtaining that Mensa membership, right?
To a bellman, the dying of the summer flame signals the winter of discontent.
This time of the year suuuucks. No doubt about it. The crowds thin out – for five days a week at least – and the lobby gets cold. Again, to say the least. Bored, cold and poor is no way to go through the winter. If I was single and – much younger – I’d move to Nevada and work as a bellman in a brothel.
Yes, I realize people who visit brothels don’t have luggage. Don’t ruin this for me!
I’ve been at work for two hours and I’ve yet to do a single call. Sure the numbers are against me, but COME ON, FATE! Throw me a frickin’ bone here, will ya?
- 8 – 9 A.M. – No calls. 1 bag for storage. 1 key delivery for Front Desk.
- 9 – 10 A.M. – No calls. No storage. No hope.
- 10 – 11 A.M. – No calls. No amateur porn stars.
- 11 – 12 P.M. – A call! And they were nice!
- 12 – 12:05 P.M. – Delivered an envelope for which I was compensated
- 12:10 – 12:123 P.M. – Delivered assorted crap to a meeting room for two ditzy corporate broads for which was I most definitely not compensated!
- 12:24 – 12;30 P.M. – I re-examined my entire life…
- 12:31 – 12:47 P.M.: – Another call! An Asian family that kept counting the number of bags on their cart, and getting it wrong! They took forever to pay their African-American cabbie and get checked-in, but they tipped well after sending me on a wild goose chase for boxes and packing tape!
- 12:50 P.M. – A woman approaches my desk, “Hi! I’m – and I have a big box!” The statement hung there for a moment and then she began to giggle before completely losing it! She had a large package in our back room but it took a few minutes to pry that info from her after the “big box” incident.
- 12:51 – 2 P.M. – “Ghost Lobby” – again! Just shoot me…
- 2:00 – 3 P.M. – More Asians. The Dad spoke a little English, but of course he took off to park the car. Left in charge of his family I did the only thing I could; took them to the room and taught them some phrases in English. “You rock, Hook!” and “Eddie is a douchebag!” – it’s funny if you know Eddie – are hilarious when spoken by a family of Asians with thick accents!
- 3:01 P.M – Shift change! A second bellman has arrived! The Hook’s tour of duty as an army of one is over!
IN OTHER NEWS…
I’ve made some changes to my normal convention plans this year: The Hook, Vampirelover and daughter will ony be attending Wizard World Toronto this year. Even fanboys have to tighten their utility belts sometimes!
The good news – for VampireLover at least – is a recent addition to the line-up. Namely, this guy…
We’ll be attending Wizard World Toronto on April 14. It is January 24, as of this writing. That means I have to listen to “I can’t believe I’m going to see Stefan!” over and over and over….
FOR 81 DAYS!
I’m sure Mr. Wesley – his real name is Wasilewski but he claims it’s too hard to pronounce, hence the change – is a nice guy, but it’s bad enough we have more than one poster of his mug in our bedroom; now I have to see him in person?
On the other hand, this is the first time VampireLover has actually beeen turned on by the prospect of attending a con – or “geekfest” as she lovingly refers to them – so I can’t complain too much, can I? Then again, 81 days is a long time…
On the other hand, there’s something for the whole family this year. For our lovely daughter…
And for yours truly, there are millions of comics, t-shirts – you can never have too many superhero Ts – and this lovely specimen of sci-fi goodness…
Unfortunately April 14 is 81 days away so that means I have to suffer through “I can’t believe I’m going to see Stefan!” AND months of cheap, drunken, horny guests before I get to indulge the fanboy deep inside.
In the meantime, take care of yourselves, okay?