Hook Meets The Three Vixens!

I head outside, bell cart in tow,ย to a van and out pops a gray-haired old lady.

VIXEN #1: That’s not big enough!

THE HOOK: I beg your pardon? That’s a little forward!

As she broke up laughing, another lady emerged…

VIXEN #2: That’s the biggest you’ve got?

THE HOOK: (I stretched my arms out to my side and looked down) This is the biggest they make!

She broke up as the third and final vixen appeared.

VIXEN#3: You’re going to need more than that!

THE HOOK: I don’t know what you ladies had in mind…

VIXEN #3: We’ve got a lot of stuff! It won’t all fit on that!

THE HOOK: Trust me ladies, I’ll take care of it. Unless you prefer to be like some of these losers who make six trips to the room…


Sure enough, they had..

  • One case of beer.
  • One cooler.
  • One radio.
  • Three duffel bags.
  • Three shopping bags full of food.
  • Eight Christmas gift bags!

But it all fit – with room to spare!

VIXEN#1: You’re good!

THE HOOK: I’m going to let that one go…

VIXEN#2: Oh, you!

They checked in, we met up at the room and they reflected on the size of their cart load.

VIXEN#1: I can’t believe how much we have! And you say some losers carry their own?

THE HOOK: I love that you used the term “loser”! But yes, they do. And if you really examine it ladies, you only have three actual bags of clothes! The rest is… assorted extras, shall we say?

VIXEN #2: We need all that!

They laughed some more, tipped me $20 and we parted ways. Looking back on recent events, it would appear my luck has balanced out somewhat these days.

For now.

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
This entry was posted in Hotel Employees, Hotel Life, Humor, Life, Postaweek2011, Social Commentary, Travel, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

74 Responses to Hook Meets The Three Vixens!

  1. eva626 says:

    people and their holiday spirit! many laughs and wish of the holidays to you mr.Hook!

  2. susielindau says:

    Of course the cart the cart! Hahaha!

  3. You know I love me some good (ahem)…

    …double entendre. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. I should have read the first sentence better before I read “I stretched my arms out to my side and looked down”.

  5. nicole says:

    haha! fashionable ladies who appreciate good service, yes! good christmas tips, yes! glad you had a laughy taffy kind of day. ๐Ÿ˜‰ x

  6. eyeLaugh says:

    lol! “that’s not big enough!” ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Deborah the Closet Monster says:

    It’s fabulous to read this, but I wish nevertheless I could watch a video of this particular set of exchanges!

  8. Life as Mia says:

    Damn I love your humor…. I gotta let u carry my bags sometimes…. XD HAHAHA!

  9. I like these girls! At least they have a sense of humor and know how to tip. Sounds like they liked you too ๐Ÿ™‚

  10. timkeen40 says:

    Never doubt the size of your…cart. When loaded by someone who knows what he’s doing, it’ll do the job nicely.

    Great story.


  11. brittany220 says:

    It’s nice that you were able to transport everything in one load instead of making multiple trips with all the stuff they had! It’s great that they gave you a big tip too.

  12. confessionsofyourhusbandsmistress says:

    Humor is the key to great customer service and a woman’s heart. Nicely done Hook! I’m sure the ladies more than appreciated the smile you brought to their face.

  13. Cindy says:

    Great gals, makes it worth it, eh Hookie? ๐Ÿ™‚

  14. Nice tip, from spunky vixens makes the day!

  15. makes your day, doesn’t it ! ๐Ÿ™‚

  16. TBM says:

    Vixens and beer…dangerous combo! I hope the rest of your holiday guests are generous!

  17. mairedubhtx says:

    They must have cheered up your day. They sound like they were fun.

  18. meredith says:

    hahaha! your posts are good for crappy monday mornings.

  19. raisingdaisy says:

    Isn’t it nice to have a break from the DBs of the world once in a while? Why can’t we have more people like these fun-loving ladies in our lives?! ๐Ÿ™‚

  20. I’m sure your, umm, “cart” is a perfect fit for my “bags”. ahem.

  21. jennygoth says:

    i never doubted the size of your cart hook lol merry xmas xxjen

  22. Dave says:

    Always a useful skill to know how to handle a gaggle of old ladies!

  23. Caroline says:

    Too funny. I love that you were able to pull the joke on not one, but all three of them. Looks like your jokes paid off though…literally. haaaha

  24. Yay! A positive story! Nice…


  25. mcqty says:

    Look at you, STUD ! Charming the ladies will do the trick! I’m really shocked they didn’t ask you back for a beer, but then you might have been the sure cause of a catfight among the vixens!!

    Happy Monday to you !

    ~~Thanks for entertaining us~~

  26. Val says:

    After the stress of your previous two posts itโ€™s nice to get a little light relief!

  27. jlheuer says:

    I think we need a picture of that bell cart someday.

    BTW, in tell Vampire lover I’m watching a vampire series set in Toronto, “Blood Ties.” Heck, she probably knows.

  28. mj monaghan says:

    LOL, monsignor Hook! And just as an aside, you are one of the most encouraging, cool dudes I’ve met in my short (some may say, and should stay that way!) blogging career. Keep on being the Hook!

  29. Could have been 3 Christmas spirits spreading some needed Christmas cheer?

  30. mizqui says:

    Awesome! Happy Holiday HOOK! I’m still on ya. (-:

  31. sami116 says:

    HAHAHA… The starting bit, such great double entendres. Short yet full of laughs. Another great post by The Hook ๐Ÿ˜€

  32. Jo Bryant says:

    I hope I’m like these old girls when ALL of my hair turns grey…I like ’em

  33. anthromes says:


    Thank you for the comments and praise on my blog. I thought I’d share this article with you, recently published in the NY Times. As someone who works in the hospitality industry I think you’d appreciate it. I travel quite a bit for work, all over the world, and have gained a particular perspective on hotel life which the author of this article relates well from a hotel guest / hotel addict standpoint… I’d be curious to hear your opinion differentiating between occasional hotel guests and those who spend most of their lives in hotels traveling for business….

    • The Hook says:

      Well-seasoned travellers have more respect – and common sense – when it comes to dealing with hotel staff. I know we make our share of mistakes, but guests need to meet us halfway and realize we’re as flawed as they are at times. Thanks for the share and the visit!

  34. mizqui says:

    How funny. I love the WIT you executed with the vixens. Quick Quips. Sharp too. Ooo!

  35. kewsmith says:

    With your charm, I bet large tips are not rare. That’s for a needed holiday laugh.

  36. kewsmith says:

    Thanks for a needed holiday laugh was what I meant to say!!

  37. Love it! I could almost see it all going down…..handsome bell man, three feisty vixens….like a scren from a great sitcom.

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