More Crazy Guests and…

So it was back to work for The Hook at 3 pm today, but first… it was time to change my oil.

I’m referring to the Hookmobile, of course. No euphemisms, the van actually needed its oil changed. Then it was time to leap right back into the fire. Unfortunately, there was no fire, no mindless mob of ignorant, impatient travelers to test my resolve against.

In short, the city morgue was busier than my humble place of business.

That’s not to say the day was completely uneventful.

Apparently a female guest picked up her bags from our storage room, commented on the fact one of her bags was no longer zipped up, claimed some gift cards were missing, and then promptly left the hotel – all in a matter of minutes! She was running late, but had the time to call back and alert our security department to her plight.

Of course, one of the cards was worth $600. This brings up an interesting facet of the modern traveler’s behaviour; whenever they lose something, it’s not simply a trivial item of moderate value, it’s the Hope Diamond! I’ve heard them all.

  • “That paper bag contained thousands of dollars in jewellery!”
  • “My $2,000 laptop was in that plastic shopping bag!”
  • “My sainted Grandmother gave me that windbreaker jacket before she was slaughtered by ninjas!”

There are travelers out there who smell blood in the water when they think a hotel has misplaced one of their items. Said item instantly increases in monetary and sentimental value and so does the size of the problem management has to wrestle with.

At least I was on the sidelines for this one.


So I’m returning to my desk with a full load of “bus bags” when I encounter a business traveler with a bell cart. As you can well imagine, I was rightfully alarmed, but the gentlemen insisted someone from the Front Desk gave him the cart. 

That didn’t do anything to reduce my growing anger.

I opted to let him go on his merry douche bag way rather than risk a trip to a manger’s office for beating him to death with his own briefcase. I had to assume his story was fabricated, as no one at the Front Desk would ever admit to handing over a cart to a guest. Besides, they deserve the benefit of the doubt, right?

I’m not completely heartless.

Still, I was seeing red for a short time, which is counter-productive when you’re serving the public. Fate has a way of dragging me back to earth in a split second, though, and that’s just what unfolded next. I noticed two housemen wearing custom wristbands that said, “I WEAR ORANGE FOR DEMI”. Turns out one of my colleagues has a daughter who has been stricken with leukemia.

She is six-years-old.

Just let the weight of that statement sink in for a moment.

Now I want you to remember just what you were doing at that age. Most of us weren’t undergoing treatment for a potentially fatal disease, that’s for sure. I’m not overly friendly with Demi’s father, but he remained foremost in my mind all day.

As a father myself, I know how I would react to the prospect of losing my child. I’d want to find a deep hole somewhere and envelop myself in eternal darkness. Warm rays of sunshine on my face would bring shame to my wounded soul. That having been said, I am still incapable of fully channelling my colleague’s state of mind at this moment. He will be allowed to spend time with his daughter at home for the weekend, and then she will be spending an indeterminate amount of time hospitalized, instead of running her parents ragged like kids her age are supposed to.

I spend a lot of time reading about comic book heroes and so I sometimes forget that a hero is also someone who reminds us of the extraordinary nature of the seemingly ordinary act of surviving. The story of Demi’s life thus far fills me with awe at the resilience of the human spirit and shame at my own petty nature.


It feels odd to return to form after pondering the nature of life, but my world doesn’t stop for anything, so neither can I.

FRANTIC FEMALE: I need to locate my husband, he’s meeting me at your parking lot that is directly outside your gift shop….

THE HOOK: We don’t have a parking lot that you can access from our gift shop, perhaps you’re thinking of another spot?

But she was certain. And so we went back and forth for a minute or so, before she snapped.

FF: (Slamming the Bell Desk with both hands!) I need to find my husband!

THE HOOK: Are you certain of that? Most wives I’ve encountered would welcome the break…

FF: (Laughing hysterically) I guess you’re right, I’ll just call him and get him to pick me up here. I think I’m mixed up anyway.

Truer words were never spoken, at least not today.

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
This entry was posted in Hotel Employees, Hotel Life, Humor, Life, Postaweek2011, Social Commentary, Travel, Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

38 Responses to More Crazy Guests and…

  1. I spend a lot of time reading about comic book heroes and so I sometimes forget that a hero is also someone who reminds us of the extraordinary nature of the seemingly ordinary act of surviving.
    So beautifully put.

    I think about how hard it was to lose my mom to cancer and then I wonder what it would be like if I lost Li’l D. In three words? What you said.

    I’m rooting for Demi, and her family.

  2. jennygoth says:

    poor kid they seem to endure more pain and bear it more easily than us grown ups i hope she recovers sounded like a mad female you had to handle lol im dizzy but not that bad hope your week aheads not too crazy lol xxjen

  3. Jo Bryant says:

    I can’t think of anything worse than a sick – really sick – child. Both of mine are in their twenties and I still feel they are babies on the cusp of great things – to be worried about their life expectancy even now would defeat me completely, but to experience it at that age – the mind, my mind, can’t comprehend it at all.

  4. Cindy says:

    I already shaved my head for two of my friends who have cancer, so I can only offer my prayers and a lit candle for Demi and her family.

  5. sonsothunder says:

    Matthew 18:3
    King James Version (KJV)
    3And Jesus said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

    Apparently, it is we adults who have left the Kingdom…Thank God, Demi is still there…Based on much observation, research, and mercies bestowed on me … I firmly believe that.

    I have to ask forgiveness though, as, putting myself in your ( Comfortable Professionally Fitted Bell Man Shoes) I am still wondering what priceless heirlooms may have come disgorging from that brief case if; “We Had Slammed Him Over The Head With It”!!! heh, sorry, just being honest.
    God Bless You

  6. Sending all my positive energy to little Demi xoxoxo

  7. That’s awesome how your humor turned out calming down an irate woman and getting her to laugh at herself.
    Poor little girl 😦
    I can’t even imagine…so sad…

  8. sonsothunder says:

    I granted you the “Versatile Blogger Award”

    Have Fun

  9. Poor little thing. My best wishes and positive energy to Demi and her family.

    P.S. Nice use of Ninjas!

  10. I can only echo what the others have already said. My girl is an adult and still I worry about her and take comfort when I know she’s healthy and happy. I’m adding my positive thoughts for Demi and her family.

    As for the Saturday installment, my laughter at that evaporated the threatening tears. You’re goood!

  11. raisingdaisy says:

    My heart goes out to your colleague and his family. What a poignant story; I’m right with you emotionally. We will definitely say a few prayers for them. Just heartbreaking.

    • The Hook says:

      Life is a constant riddle, isn’t it? I don’t know why something like this has to happen to one so young, but Demi has a lot of people in her corner, including one cute puppy!

  12. HoaiPhai says:

    There is no tear so bitter as that of a child. My heart and highest hopes go out to Demi.

  13. irratebass says:

    Nice recovery with that wifey and man I never lose anything of vaule, I guess that’s a good thing, but when I lose or forget something in a hotel it’s usually a hat or something.

  14. Kim says:

    “That paper bag contained thousands of dollars in jewellery!” – Yeah, sure…

  15. Caroline says:

    My heart goes out to Demi and her family. I can’t even imagine. I’ll pray for them!

  16. I’m praying that Demi beats it. I can’t imagine.
    Oh and that guest looking for her husband? Good save because she is cray cray.

  17. Okay…
    A: The lady at the end is in serious need of a Valium. No wonder her husband is incognito. B: I thought you owned a Bat-mobile. A part of me is really disappointed to hear otherwise.
    C: Thank you for helping me gain perspective on my own meager problems with the story about the child with Leukemia. I can’t even imagine being a parent going through that, and am just filled with empathy for that child.
    D: I missed ya Hook. Never a dull moment with you. 😉

  18. I envy the way you can turn a phrase to diffuse an angry person… props to the way you handled Frantic Female!

  19. bats0711 says:

    Who the hell has a $600 gift card? Damn I want one of those and I can guarantee it’s getting spent right away!

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