“Do You Have Any Pushmobiles?”

Sometimes these posts write themselves.

You just have to hope the world doesn’t run out of old. wrinkled douchebags who don’t know what you call a device used to carry luggage! You would think after eighty years of walking this earth a man would know what a luggage cart is.

Or a full-service hotel, for that matter.

To make matters much worse, this old bugger was traveling with two middle-aged D-bags, one of whom was, pound for pound, one of the biggest idiots on the planet.

Heck, pound for pound, he was a planet!

Unfortunately, his brain did not match his girth and he too had trouble grasping the concept of a hotel with bellmen.

PLANET GUEST:  You mean we can’t take one of those things on our own?

THE HOOK:  No sir, we’re here to help you. We’re a full-service hotel. We do everything for you.

PLANET GUEST:  That’s what you’re trying to tell us?

THE HOOK:  Desperately, sir!

PLANET GUEST:  Oh! Well we’re okay, then!

And so, the three clueless buggers made their way out to the second floor of the hotel’s parking garage and grabbed four bags each! Twenty minutes later, Planet Guest dragged his poor wife and two young daughters out to the garage and loaded them down with more bags!

It’s a shame, too, because his daughters really wanted a ride on the “Pushmobile”.

See you in the lobby, kids…

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
This entry was posted in Hotel Employees, Hotel Life, Life, Postaweek2011, Social Commentary, Travel, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

50 Responses to “Do You Have Any Pushmobiles?”

  1. KiNgDeeM! says:

    I know how it is bro! I been there I was a valet for quite a few years, people always wanted to park and unload there own cars and then they wanted a spot in the front. pfft, eff that noise!

  2. Woman says:

    LOL!!!! Mister The Hook…. sometime I wish I had your job for a day!!! I would just giggle and laugh the whole day!!!

  3. Kim says:

    luggage cart??? Huh? 😉

  4. haha!! The things people say.

  5. Planet Guest was trying not to tip ya so he could have another Big Mac !

  6. Its sometimes annoying when ppl behave like they are doing it for the first time… You have a lot of patience to bear them all! I can imagine my state…

  7. mairedubhtx says:

    Pisuhmobile is an interesting name for a luggage cart. I’m convinced that many people don’t understand what a full service hotel means. They’ve been staying at Holiday Inn Express for too long.

  8. irratebass says:

    I’ve never stayed at a full service hotel, so I was quite surprised that you wouldn’t let him use it. I’ve always used those, but then again never stayed at a full service hotel…I’s Po’!

  9. penpusherpen says:

    some people just don’t appreciate service… or being helped, I’d let you have my bags anytime. (um., that sounds wrong, but you know what I mean, right?) … 😉 xPenx

  10. raisingdaisy says:

    LOL!! I know these idiots are probably aggravating for all of you, but they sure are funny for the rest of us!!! 😀 The silver lining, maybe? Albeit a thin one for you!

  11. doronio says:

    I just realized how much I missed your posts. I get how that goes… Except the assholes at the hotel I work at get pissed off when we tell them we’re not full-service and that they’re more than welcome to use the luggage carts just outside the lobby. They then proceed to grumble to themselves and their wives about guest services.

  12. bmj2k says:

    “That’s what you’re trying to tell us?” Ah, the simplicity of a statement that clearly shows that the person saying it has no ideas what you are trying to tell them.

  13. Jackie Paulson Author says:

    I would not want your job, but you are so gifted at it…..I would love a golf cart for just whatever reason. I can think of so many things to use the cart for. Besides the obvious that the Clients do not see! LOL love it.

  14. jlheuer says:

    Face it Hook, they are cheap bastards and they don’t want to have to tip you for moving their bags. Also why do these people have sooo much luggage?

  15. So that’s what you call the thing with the wheels and the brass bars with the flat thing to put stuff on. I always wondered. I like push mobile lol. This evoked such a wonderful visual in my head. I pictures planer guest with a gravelly almost sound distorted type voice. Can’t stop smiling as I picture it 🙂

  16. Caroline says:

    Oh, clueless people. Though, I agree with the daughters, would be fun to ride on the “pushmobile,” ha!

  17. jennyozzy says:

    over here we call that a trolley and i would love you to push mine lol might as well have everything done for you if the service is there to use id have you pouring my wine and feeding me grapes lol or is that extra have a good weekend hook xxjen

  18. eva626 says:

    I always wanted to ride around IN the trolley…seems like fun!

  19. jennyozzy says:

    your wife has good taste hook thanks for your visit did you bring your garlic lol xxjen

  20. Hmm…you think maybe this guy is accustomed to ‘shwank’-motels? (That would be my husband’s word for low-class accomodations.)

  21. writernubbin says:

    I don’t travel or stay in hotels with bellmen for that matter. Of course it’s a pushmobile 😉 And I want a ride too! I’m short and won’t take up too much room. And I’ll give you a nice tip for making my day! LOL

  22. brittany220 says:

    Job shadowing you for a day would be fun, just sayin’. Haha!

  23. This seems to happen a lot – people wanting to “self serve.” Maybe they think it’s like some luggage cart at the airport.

  24. How many tickets for a ride on the Pushmobile, Hook? LOL.


  25. mindslam says:

    Yea, I want a ride too…would you just roll me down the stairs? LOL

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