Sometimes these posts write themselves.
You just have to hope the world doesn’t run out of old. wrinkled douchebags who don’t know what you call a device used to carry luggage! You would think after eighty years of walking this earth a man would know what a luggage cart is.
Or a full-service hotel, for that matter.
To make matters much worse, this old bugger was traveling with two middle-aged D-bags, one of whom was, pound for pound, one of the biggest idiots on the planet.
Heck, pound for pound, he was a planet!
Unfortunately, his brain did not match his girth and he too had trouble grasping the concept of a hotel with bellmen.
PLANET GUEST: You mean we can’t take one of those things on our own?
THE HOOK: No sir, we’re here to help you. We’re a full-service hotel. We do everything for you.
PLANET GUEST: That’s what you’re trying to tell us?
THE HOOK: Desperately, sir!
PLANET GUEST: Oh! Well we’re okay, then!
And so, the three clueless buggers made their way out to the second floor of the hotel’s parking garage and grabbed four bags each! Twenty minutes later, Planet Guest dragged his poor wife and two young daughters out to the garage and loaded them down with more bags!
It’s a shame, too, because his daughters really wanted a ride on the “Pushmobile”.
See you in the lobby, kids…