Let’s face it, reality is boring. Who wouldn’t want to live in a reality where you can define the parameters?
Unfortunately, sometimes people try to write a new reality for themselves at the cost of others. In this case, it’s The Hook who paid the price.
Every year my place of business hosts a National Hockey League fantasy camp where participants plunk down thousands of dollars to play hockey and golf with ex-NHLers. The campers, mostly Alpha Males, are under the assumption the life of a NHLer consists of getting blind, stinking drunk and hitting on EVERYTHING that moves!
Actually, the campers aren’t the problem, it’s the conveners who are the nightmare.
Every single year, these yahoos storm into the hotel and change the sign to “THE DOUCHEBAG INN”! They’re rude, obnoxious and they choose to completely ignore any and all rules we have in place. The hotel graciously provides bell carts for the conveners to use to move their equipment and any gifts they hand out to campers. Their luggage is another matter entirely.
Tell that to these morons.
We tell them they can use three carts, they take seven. We tell them to let us know when they need to move their bags, they steal additional carts from our storage room and move their own bags.
The campers tip pretty well and the ex-NHLers are decent guys overall, but the schmucks who run this thing always promise to tip us well at the end but never actually do so.
Did I mention the added wrinkle this year?
A U-Haul truck pulls up and they literally throw over a hundred hockey bags and sticks on the deck for three bellmen to deliver to various campers’ rooms. It actually became two bellmen, though, when The Hook headed out an hour after his shift was supposed to end!
A guy can only take so much, right?
BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE!
As the fantasy camp was winding down, a whole other nightmare was just beginning. Two words: Cheerleading Competition!
To be continued…
It turns out that the head honcho of this so-called fantasy camp did tip the bellmen – a week later! Still, it was a generous amount and now The Hook is asking anyone with a good crow recipe to send it over immediately.