Fun With Guests And Hookers.

A goofy-looking guest in his mid-twenties, (think Screech with half decent clothes and glasses!) approaches the Bell Desk. Fortunately, The Hook is working!

RANDOM YOUNG HORNY GUEST: Hey guy, my buddy and I waiting for some girls. We’ll be in the bar, can you let us know when they get here?

THE HOOK: Certainly sir, what do the lucky young ladies look like? (I’ve discovered  you can mask sarcasm if you speak quickly and in a strong voice!)

RYHG: Uhh, I don’t know.

THE HOOK: While I am good at my job sir, I’m afraid I’m going to need more than that…

RYHG: Well, we’re paying them…

THE HOOK: Gotcha!

Money CAN buy you love. And antibiotics.

Money CAN buy you love. And antibiotics.

When you’ve worked in a hotel long enough you develop heightened senses that allow you to identify a person’s occupation by their appearance. Off-duty cops have a worn down look in their eyes, teachers and principals wear cheap business attire and look REALLY miserable.

And hookers?

Hookers look confused, (At least until they spot the john in question, then the call-girl smile takes over!) and are dressed  slutty, but not so much they look like they belong on the street. Sure enough, two young, petite  blonds soon show up, dressed like school-girls who have changed their parental-approved clothes in the washroom before class!

Off they go for the night. The young guests in question seemed to forget the fact you don’t need to take a hooker on a date to get lucky! Nonetheless, the same guys approach The Hook the next night in a very good mood. Obviously.

RYHG: Hey guy! Those girls from last night really liked us!

THE HOOK: I wouldn’t have expected anything less, sir.

RYHG: I know, we’re nice guys, right?

THE HOOK: Sure, sir. That’s it exactly.

RYHG: You know how I know they really liked us?

THE HOOK: I have a feeling I’m about to find out…

RYHG: They’re going back out with us tonight. For free! (He was almost squealing like a school-girl, I swear!)

Obviously the hookers in question knew they could milk these guys even further by cutting out their pimp/agency and taking them out on their own. Or, the Universe is just crazy enough to have paired these two horny schmucks with two hookers with hearts of gold.

Yeah, right.

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
This entry was posted in Hotel Life, Life, Postaweek2011, Travel, Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

41 Responses to Fun With Guests And Hookers.

  1. penpusherpen says:

    oh dear me…there’s one (in this case two) born every minute…or so it seems… 😀 xPenx

  2. Hahahahahahahahaha….I want to work with you. Except I would probably get fired for laughing too much!!

  3. Aaron Babcock says:

    I enjoy any story which allows me to laugh at the dipshits in our world, so thank you very much for this one!

  4. Kim says:

    Ah, you work in a hotel? Didn’t know that 😀
    Interesting to know!

  5. eva626 says:

    wow…the people you meet hook! lol

  6. I love living vicariously through you, Hook. Although many times, I would love to be a fly on the wall when you encounter these people.

  7. timkeen40 says:

    How cool is that job you have! As a writer, I just see new material walking in the door every night.

    • The Hook says:

      it’s true. Now I just need to take my blog to the next level and maybe make some money from all these nutcases I deal with every day.

  8. You really have some awesome stories. You could write a book 😀

  9. You’ve seen and heard it all. Comes with working the territoty.

  10. bmj2k says:

    “I’ve discovered you can mask sarcasm if you speak quickly and in a strong voice!”

    When discussing hookers with a John in a busy lobby, I think the louder the better.

  11. Tom Dye says:

    So these girls while still under the employ of the boys, promised them a free date? Me thinks you can pay some people to do or SAY just about anything. I wonder, did these girls of high morals kept their promise and show up the next night?

  12. mizqui says:

    You’re a CREATIVE & LITERAL hoot!
    HOOK — I am duly ENJOYING YOU!

    I do love PERUSING your chronicled fruits.
    THANKS for your SUPPORT on my web’d views too.

    Keep HOOK’ing ’em …You’ve already got me. (-:

  13. doronio says:

    I’m closing in on my first year working at a hotel myself. I loved this post because you do see a lot of random people doing random things.

    On my first week I had to help kick out a hooker. I’ve never seen one in person until then. In my head I was imagining a pretty hooker, then at least she’d be somewhat justified. I get that sometimes you have to work with what you got, and if you only have your looks… Yeah… Apparently, only politicians and basketball players get the top-notch chicks.

    Anyways, good stuff!

  14. mindslam says:

    You make this job sound so interesting. I owned a pet store back in the early 90’s & have always liked dealing with the public. Man, you really get to deal with the public & because of the job…such a diverse group of people. No wonder your writing is so good & fun to read! That was funny!

  15. jlheuer says:

    I’m an ex-librarian, you’ld be surprised how many of your customers sound like my customers.

  16. Ironic Mom says:

    I’m still laughing at how you nailed teachers. I am one, and I am aware of our style skills. I think The Onion put it best in their article, “Teacher of the Year Awards ‘A Fashion Nightmare'”.,357/

    Thanks for the laugh!

  17. Woman says:

    Oh lordy!!!! What I wouldn’t give to go to work with you for a day!!!!! LOL!!!!!

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