There are Wedding Crashers. There are Draft Dodgers. There all sorts of individuals who have made it their life’s work to bend society’s rules, which doesn’t usually bother The Hook.
Except in one case.
When you’re travelling and you accept the help of an individual in the service industry, you enter into an unwritten, unspoken agreement with said individual. They provide a service, you provide compensation out of gratitude. It’s a pretty good system that benefits both parties.
But Tip Dodgers ruin it for everyone. They drive service personnel crazy and that mood gets passed on to the next unlucky sap who asks for help.
Take for example, the guy who runs up to The Hook at the height of check-out time to ask for his own cart because “My daughter is violently ill.”
I don’t care if she’s got a severed limb, rules are rules. After arriving at the guest’s room and meeting his son and wife (she picked a winner, folks!), I proceed to load the bags. The guest arrives a minute later and proclaims “I lost my (expletive) wallet!”
If the supposedly ill daughter didn’t faze me, do you think this bought him any sympathy?
Anyway, during the elevator ride down the guest remarks “I just won the lottery!”, something his son didn’t even believe. I asked “Sir, how will you claim your winnings without your identification in your wallet?”
The silence was golden.
“SEE, I TOLD YOU WE DIDN’T NEED A BELLMAN.”
See you in the lobby, friends…