5×5 With The Hook: Nicki Daniels.

Reading her work is like mainlining non-addictive heroin and Red Bull while juggling grenades on a treadmill – that is suspended over a shark tank.

She is Nicki Daniels and she has conquered a sizable portion of the universe we know as  WordPress after a mere three months of blogging. Seriously, this chick has become a force to be reckoned with almost overnight.

How does she do it, you ask?

Well….

  • She’s willing to be naked in front of the crowd, as they say.
  • There are no secrets between her and her loyal followers.
  • She lays down the law when necessary.
  • The past is not a place she fears to tread; this sets her apart from the pack.

You know what? All this sweetness is giving me a toothache. Let’s fire this puppy up, kids! After all, Nicki’s blog is called The Nicki Daniels Interview, so let’s get down to brass tacks, shall we?

Official WordPress trophy and sword. "Where's Waldo?" ensemble sold separately.

“GAME OF WALDOS!”

1)  We just met, but you seem pretty cool. That having been said, if you could be any literary character for a day, who would you choose?

   I am obsessed with the dark side of human nature. I love reading about serial killers and famous crimes.

   When it comes to fiction, I am a sucker for a great villain. I  just finished Stephen King’s Doctor Sleep , the sequel to The Shining. The antagonist of this very entertaining book is an immortal creature named Rose the Hat. She’s kind of like a vampire, except instead of living off of blood she lives off “steam”, the life essence of children. It’s a rollicking read, and Rose is a delicious amalgamation of Hannibal Lecter, Sophia Loren, and Caligula. Rose is beautiful, cunning, brilliant, and of course very dangerous. Her whole life is lived in the pursuit of pleasure. Yet she is complicated. Even though she is a killer without morals, she is capable of love.

   I would totally be this bad bitch for a day.

2)  Your favorite Bee Gee is…

   You’re showing your age, Hookey!

   I have a secret passion for disco, how did you know? Back in my wild young days, there was this dilapidated nightclub down by the river that did a disco night on Sundays. I would storm the dance floor as soon as I heard the amazing glass shattering falsetto of Barry Gibb, I was in booty shakin’ heaven. I also have a bit of a beard fetish and I challenge you to look at  a photo of 1973 Barry and tell me he was not a dish!

   Any guy who can wear a gold jumpsuit without a trace of irony and still look masculine…meow.

BARRY IS THE ONE IN THE MIDDLE, KIDS. ENJOY.

3)  As a bellman, I’m fascinated by the concept of travel and how it relates to the human condition.  Please tell me a little about your favorite trip – anywhere, at any time in your life – and how it impacted your life.

   I haven’t done a ton of travelling. I’m no Aussa Lorens, or anything. But like many college age people, in my early twenties I did the whole tour of Europe thing. It is always a big deal the first time you go overseas. I expected to be caught up in the exoticism of everything, but in reality I was a little let down by the how similar everything was to home. I had gotten used to the monotony here in the states, but I expected Europe to amaze me.

   Take Paris, for example. I was foaming at the mouth to get to the City of Lights. But there is still McDonald’s. Still homeless people and litter in the streets. This sounds like a bummer but it was a valuable lesson. I learned that my imagination is more fertile than is probably  good for me. And I learned that globalization is real. If we can’t manage to scale back the growth of corporations overseas, pretty soon the whole world is going to be one big Walmart stuck atop a garbage dump.

4)  Your favorite stand-up comic is…

   Man, that’s a tough one. I love to laugh more than anything else on the planet, so comedians are very exalted to me.

   I think the late, great George Carlin really had it nailed. That guy could go off on a spoken word tangent that would just blow your mind. He was funny as fuck, but take away the jokes and you actually had some really shrewd commentary on the state of the world today. His last special, It’s Bad For Ya is available on Netlix On Demand, and it shows Carlin as a social satirist and badass SOB at the top of his game.

   If you wanna hear a little secret though, Hookey, stand-up is something I’ve always aspired to do myself. Shhhh.

5)  How do you feel?  (Sorry, I just watched Star Trek IV, but if you haven’t you’re going to be feeling very confused right now… If you could just answer the question, that’d be cool. I’m going to take my meds now.)

   Right now? Kind of like I need to take a poop.

   OK, seriously. I feel….grateful. I started my blog in mid-November of last year and I didn’t have a lot of expectations. I am not a college graduate and haven’t written anything I’ve shared with others since high school. It has been incredibly gratifying to see my blog grow so quickly. Starting a blog is scary, especially for those of us who don’t blog anonymously.

   I’m feeling like a badass. I’m feeling like I can conquer the world with nothing but my laptop and my ladyballs. I’m realizing that there is power in words, all of our words, and we can use them to do anything we want. That, my friend, is an awesome feeling.

   It is awesome to be a part of this community.

*************************************************************************************

And we’re happy to have you hear, Nicki.

Well, kids, I’m going to let you take some time to absorb Nicki’s particular mix of cool. This has been fun. Let’s do this again soon, okay?

I WROTE A BOOK.  HERE’S WHAT THE BACK LOOKS LIKE.

About The Hook

Husband. Father. Bellman. Author of The Bellman Chronicles. Reader of comic books and observer and chronicler of the human condition. And to my wife's eternal dismay, a mere mortal and non-vampire. I'm often told I look like your uncle, cousin, etc. If I wore a hat, I'd hang it on a hat rack in my home in Niagara Falls, Canada. You can call me The Hook, everyone else does.
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124 Responses to 5×5 With The Hook: Nicki Daniels.

  1. Daile says:

    Loving the 5×5 Hook and it seems like you can get any blogger to do them for you. It’s like a round up of all the interesting & popular blogs ever. You must have a secret power I don’t know about yet. Keep up the awesome work!!

  2. You lost me at the picture of the BeeGees… couldn’t read a thing after that.What’s been seen cannot be unseen. Love their music, the look, not so much.

  3. The Hook says:

    The only way Nicki could be any cooler is if you lock her in the freezer, kids.
    Consider this your extremely early Christmas gift. You’re welcome.

  4. Mich-in-French says:

    Brilliant Hook! Love Nicki’s answers and I must admit the Bee Gees pic made me seriously lose focus for while – those hairy chests and tight gold pants are going to give me nightmares for a long time…I can listen to them anytime but seriously who was their stylist…I suppose it was Austin Power’s stylist so that would make sense then…maybe they all wanted to be Gold Member (lol) okay I digress…loved this one!;)

    • Blasphemy! Barry was HOTT. Actually, you know what? I used to have a pretty bad cocaine problem and now that I’m REALLY looking at this picture I’m thinking I may have been a little….deluded.

      • Mich-in-French says:

        Nicki – I have to say with my eyes closed he is just dreamy but those gold pants can seriously screw with your head as would the powder lol

  5. Jennifer says:

    Nice job, love the Carlin quote. As for the BeeGees pictures… I’ve gotta agree with Mich-in-French

  6. I love the questions you come up with every time. Well done!

  7. Great interview – and she loves George Carlin…WHOO HOO!

  8. My Muted Voice says:

    Great choice Hook! Nicki is definitely a fave and a force to be reckoned with!

    Nicki I love the dark side of human nature too and am fascinated by serial killers and crime. I just want to know what makes them tick and how they got to that place. And seriously, George Carlin is awesome. That is what I loved about him too. Sure, he made you laugh, but he usually delivered an important and interesting message along the way. He would say the things most people only thought about. The more I learn about you the more I love. :-)

  9. I’m a George Carlin fan, also. As for the Bee Gees, you can keep ‘em. :) Great Q&A!!

  10. Twindaddy says:

    Nicki is awesome, indeed.

  11. Calamity Rae says:

    It was great to see Nicki hooked! Well deserved as she is definitely a woman with cajones. But more importantly, she knows and understands her brand of funny and I think she’s a darn smart lady. I smell success and a bit of filet o….=) *wink*

  12. samara says:

    Nicki girl-
    you are my hero.
    My best post ever is a love poem to you. You know that, right?
    xo,
    S

    P.S. Hook – you’re awesome, too. Except the Bee Gees. That falsetto register sounded like they had rubber bands tied around their balls.

    • That’s so sweet, Samara. Actually, your best post is yet to come, because you are evolving in amazing ways.

      And I think the falsetto register was more a result of having the nasal passages and throat completely gummed up with cocaine.

      • samara says:

        Ahh, the nasal passages. Mine will never forgive me.

        I’m “blaming it all, on the nights on Broadway…”
        The frickin’ 90s were lethal, man.

    • I once spilled some coke in a bathroom stall and my friend just hoovered it off my silver lame-covered crotch. Now we both have kids. Life is weird.

      • samara says:

        We are EXACTLY who should be raising kids. Who else is gonna tell my kid “Bros before Ho’s?” Certainly not his father. Little Dude is 10. He needs to KNOW these things.

        And your coke-crotch story is all good, darlin’. I did that on purpose. Many times. Those frickin’ 90’s…

    • I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: former alcoholic sluts make the best wives and mothers.

  13. “Whether you’re a brother or whether you’re;you’re Stayin’ Alive, Stayin Alive!” Uh….sorry! I was lost in the moment there! he he! Ok..showing MY age now! Great interview as always! This chick ROCKS!~

  14. Where your beauty and charisma come exploding out from your picture, the bookshelf gets me every time. I’m willing to bet you are wearing two different colored socks.

    Probably a result from all of the exploding, umm, yeah, never mind. Socks, two different colored socks, that’s all.

    • I have the most disorganized bookshelves EVER. They are all over my house.

      And you’re right about the two different socks. I am also completely bald under my beanie.

  15. Jami says:

    Nicki – George Carlin has always been my favorite comedian. :-) He always managed to the most political statements under the guise of (slightly crazed) hilarity! This one still cracks me up every time I watch it, even if I am a tree hugger myself: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjmtSkl53h4

    Hook – Thanks for featuring some pretty awesome bloggers lately!

    • Thanks for the laughs, Jami! “The Planet is Fine, the People are Farked”. (I don’t know if I can cuss here, Hookey) Anyway, I want that on a t-shirt.

  16. Aussa Lorens says:

    Wearing a gold tracksuit is so easy, even a caveman can do it. <— that's all I could think this entire time. Clearly I am not worthy of George Carlin-ness humor.

    I'm not surprised that you have a fondness for studying serial killers. We can add this to our list of things to do whilst staying up late, getting wine-drunk, and shirking our life responsibilities.

    Also: What is this subtle shout-out I see? *blushes*

  17. speaker7 says:

    My main take away from this is that the gold suit needs to come back.

    • It would look awesome on Hugo.

    • jaklumen says:

      I dunno about the gold lamé fabric of the seventies. The Bee Gees could make it look good, especially Barry, but…

      Reminds me of the time we were downtown and Dutch Bros opened a shop on the busy drag and they had twenty-somethings shilling free coffee and whipped cream. I think they were supposed to be dressed as retro-’80s hipsters and one chick was wearing lamé pants and I almost said aloud to her, “Honey, those pants were bad the first time around!”

  18. Britt says:

    What fun! Only in this weird little world would the snarky bellman cross paths with this spunky cutie. Loved the whole thing. Big fan of the pair of you.

  19. Love this. Does he ask the same five questions every time? Cause I’ve been, like, nowhere. Wait I can talk about the time I went to the top of all these freaking stairs to see Mt Rushmore with my ex-boyfriend and . . . then we went back down again.

  20. Trent Lewin says:

    Crike, she is a badass. Her bloody INTERVIEW

  21. Trent Lewin says:

    …is a better read than most of the stuff I post! No wonder she’s taking over the blogosphere… I got no problem with that.

    Nice interview, Hook person. But Bee Gees? Really? Bee Gees when you could have/should have said Abba?

    • Awww, shit, it’s about to be a disco bloodbath up in here.

      And, Trent, I’m not trying to take over anything except my side of the bed. My husband keeps rolling into my spot, and I want it back.

      • Trent Lewin says:

        My regards to your husband, Nicki. That battle seems to be fought in every bed. And when you add kids… it’s a massacre.

        Come on, stick up for Abba! If you’re gonna go full disco, knock-offs need not apply.

    • The Hook says:

      Abba had their time in the spotlight again when the movie version of “Mamma Mia!” came out. I’m a child of the Seventies so the Brothers Gibb were first and foremost on my mind.

      • Trent Lewin says:

        True Abba fans such as myself have blotted that musical and movie from our memories (although some, like me, have seen both). Abba is from the seventies too! So am I. There, I’ve dated myself.

  22. Excellent interview and of course a perfect subject. I don’t know how you do it either but don’t stop.

    Ah, the Bee Gees…sigh.

  23. Nadia says:

    Nicki, not only can you write a mean post, you can give one mean interview. As for Barry and his gold gear… I think I need the ladies’. And not in a good way.

  24. Serial killers, scowling at multinational corporations destroying individuality of places, George Carlin, and Dr Sleep? She sounds like a winner…(even with the disco)
    Blog on Nicki!
    Nice interview, Hook. Thanks for the intro

  25. Excellent interview! Love Rose The Hat! Everyone is addicted reading your blog because you write from the heart, no B.S. That’s the best kind of writing there is! All the best, Nicki!

  26. Loved the questions…and the answers. Great job, guys! (Suddenly missing George Carlin.)

  27. giselzitrone says:

    Wünsche einen schönen Abend,eine Dunkle Seite hat wohl jeder von uns sie schlummert in jeden Menschen.Liebe Grüße mal von mir,und eine gute Woche.Gruß Gislinde

  28. mollytopia says:

    I’m a fan – you’re awesome – hooray!

    • Thanks, Molly! I am sick this week and working my way through my bookmarked blogs…yours is one of them.

      • mollytopia says:

        Being sick is such a party when you have a spouse, a kid, a job and a blog-I’ll order the piñata! Seriously, sorry you’re no feeling bueno. Hope you’re back to 110% soon!

      • Thanks, hon. I’ve seriously been sick for a week and I’m not getting better. I think this might be the end. Or maybe I’m over-dramatic.

      • mollytopia says:

        Ohdeargahd. Sounds like the same crap I had for three of the longest weeks of my LIFE. I hope it’s not that. Take care lady! Big squeeze and antibiotics to you : )

  29. List of X says:

    “I can conquer the world with nothing but my laptop and my ladyballs.”
    I think you’ll also need a god jumpsuit.

  30. unfetteredbs says:

    A grand interview and nice to meet you. And now , I must bleach the gold out of my eyes. Gagggg

  31. curvyroads says:

    So late to the party, but so glad that I came – definitely a fan of Nicki and her lady balls!

    Got a lot of catching up to do, thanks Hook, again! ;-)

  32. Pingback: URL

  33. Nicki’s hilarious. And I totally share her beard fetish, and that Barry guy is indeed delicious!

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